well a lot has been happening recently my middle daughter has been in & out of hospital for various tests, she is only 12 & she suffers with ulcers in her stomach  i didnt think that someone of that age would be able to suffer from somthing like that, but i guess i was wrong.  not only that, she also suffers from blank seizures & she has done for the past 4 years, but its only been recently that the hospital have decided to do something about it, but whats really annoying me is, i have informed her school that she suffers from these seizures & they dont believe me even with a doctors letter to support the fact, so at the moment i am really pissed off

on a lighter note though, i received some post this morning, & it all looked like junk mail until i took a closer look, & what i found certainly brightened my day, my youngest daughter had sent me a post card from school & it said 'to mummy i love you with all of my heart love jessica' awwww how cute was that, i couldnt stop smiling all day  love you baby girl

i dont know if anybody read my other post about a close family friend (conor) who got stabbed last month, well were arranging a peace walk in conor's memory, were hoping to bring the attention to how bad knife crime has got in england, not only here but all over the world, so this walk will me in memory of all those that have been killed through either knife or gun crime, it waill take place on saturday 18th october, i will keep you posted on that, & hopefully things will turn out great.

before i forget happy birthday to my nephew james, sorry i cant be there to share you day but have a fantastic time mate, love you loads xx

thats all im going to write tonight

take care all xx clare xx

its been a mad few days for me, i had my middle daughter at the hospital on friday, she was there for a routine appointment but because we got there early i also booked her into accident & emergency, i booked her in there because when she woke up in the morning she couldnt open her eyes, they were all swollen &  it looked like shed done about 5 rounds in a boxing ring, so i wasnt happy with the look of her.  anyway when she got seen by the doctor he said that she had really bad hay-fever, now i know she has hay-fever but ive never seen her that bad, anyway the doctor said that there was nothing they could do for her, he said if he gave her eye drops they would just make her feel worse, so he sent her away with nothing.

after being in accident & emergency i had to take tasha for her other appointment, now this appointment was set up by my own g.p. & the reason he sent her was because shes not eating as she should, everytime she eats she gets pain in her tummy, & being a mother if your child doest eat for a long time you worry. anyway we went in to see the consultant about her not easting & she examined her & stuff, & she said that she has ulcers (now as far as im concerned shes too young to get ulcers, but i could be wrong), so what she plans to do is have her taken into the hospital & have a camera inserted down her throat to find out exactly what is causing her the pain when she eats, well when the consultant told tasha that she got all upset & started crying, so i had to explaine to her that she wouldnt feel a thing & that she would be put to sleep before they did it. the consultant that we saw was really good, she looked through tashas history & decided that she wanted to get everything sorted & by everything i mean, backv in 2004 latasha was diagnosed with havin black sezures (that is where she just looks like shes staring into space, & she hasnt got a clue what is going on around her, & it can be quiet serious, just like people who have fits) anyway the consultant realised that latasha hadnt had any form of tests to find out how bad it is & decide what medication she needs to keep it under control, so the consultant is also sorting that out for her also, maybe now she can get the medication that she needs. before we left the hospital the consultant perscribed some medication for latasha to help with her stomach problems, she also gave her some eye drops for her eyes (so much for the other doctor saying that he cant do anything for her)

over the weekend i have been helping my eldest daughter rebecca get things ready for camping, because shes going camping with school on monday & shes not going to be back untill friday, im going to miss her, i know she can be a pain in the arse at times, but what kid isnt lol, i just hope she enjoys herself i know shes looking forward to it, but i also think shes going to miss me & her sisters also.

ive been on the phone to the love of my life this weekend, i phone him every night, i just wish i could be with him every night, im still missing him like crazy & its just going to get worse for the both of us, because he moves to new york next week & were not going to be able to talk to each other until he get put on the phone over there & we dont know how long that will be, but i will always be thinking about him, just like he thinks about me all the time.  i know he loves me so very much & he knows that i love him so very much, were just going to have to remind ourselves how very much in love we are & i think that will (or should) keep us going until we can talk on the phone again, but for now we dont have to worry too much because we have until thursday.

this is a little message for chandler, baby i love you so very very much & im missing you like crazy, i cant wait to be back in your arms again & kissing you beautiful, sexy lips  i love you with all my heart & more xx

well i will write again real soon so for now take care all xx